we're chasing vodka with high fives
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
20 People Who Caught Their Significant Others Cheating and Hand Over Some Major Karma
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
33 Memes You’ll Find Uncomfortably Relatable If You’ve Ever Been Through A Messy Breakup
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!