her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
birth control should be required to get into college
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
He turned down a handjob. A HANDJOB. I know I'm no Jessica Simpson, but...
Actually, she's fat now, so...
Fuck. I AM Jessica Simpson.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
