i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
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