so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize
