How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Randomize
