those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
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