Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
