Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
Randomize
