I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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