Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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