Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
