I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Randomize
