I'm so fucking centered right now
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
