haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
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