Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Randomize
