I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
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You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
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His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
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