Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Randomize
