dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize