she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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