She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Randomize
