Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Did we literally take a cab across the street
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
