Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
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