I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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