is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
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