playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize