is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
