this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
