eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize
