The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
she told me i tasted like america
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Randomize