Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Randomize
