An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
i dont even know how to be here
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize
