We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize
