Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
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