it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
