Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize
