To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
