so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
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You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
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You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
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