Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
