Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
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