I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Randomize
