Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Randomize
