I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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