I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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