Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Randomize