Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
is that a dick in a sweater?
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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