what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Randomize