What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
i black out too much to be "responsible"
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
Randomize
