woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
These 21 Drunks Said The Darndest Things
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
These 25 Irresponsible People Blew All Their Cash On Drugs, Booze, & Sex
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.