My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
Randomize
