i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Randomize