so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
50% drunk capacity currently
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize
