Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Randomize
